Goals for 2012

This year I started this blog, Whole Grain Bread: A Grace Reader as a means to encourage other readers, but I fell short, mostly from being overly ambitious. I wanted to write every day,  but I got to a point where there were distractions, and let my writing lapse and become infrequent and inconsistent. Also, I got to a point were I just did not want to write, at least not without substance. I want the things I write to have meaning and be significant. I write this blog primarily for myself as a benchmark and a rubrik for growth, but I also write with the intention that others will read my blog, too. 

If you have been reading my blog this year, thank you for taking time to read the different entries. My desire is to write more in 2012, and be more consistent. Things are difficult for me right now, and I may not be able to write every day, but I am sure going to try, God willing. I would like to write about important issues without making it seem like I am complaining. Sometimes I do complain a lot, and sometimes I ramble on. I enjoy writing about things, and I will be making it my mission to find things that build and encourage the reader to grow and move beyond personal comfort zones this next year. I will try to ask questions that require more that a wading pool answer. Life is not easy, and people are hungry. I want to share the food of truth whenever I am able.

Personal goals for 2012:

• Find a new job that pays well
• Return to college.
• Continue to draw
• Volunteer with my local library
• Attend men's Bible study.
• Start repaying some of my debts.
• Start saving and learn to invest what I earn.

--Kirk

Approaching Christmas 2011

"When times are tough, God makes us tougher in Christ." -Kirk McConnell, December 2011

The year has come and gone already. Somehow I blinked, and it is December again. It is definitely not my favorite time of year. I am not really in the Christmas spirit. Being of good cheer is not something I have at this moment, but not for a lack of trying.  I have wrapped presents for my nieces and nephews, and made some custom iron-on T-shirts for them, too, hoping it will all be appreciated. I am at a point realizing, the children are getting older. They do not need toys, so what can I give them? This is a time when we celebrate the birth of Jesus as shared with us in the gospels. I try to remember that Jesus is the one, true gift that God bestowed upon us. I keep recalling that if God did not love us, it is highly likely that Jesus would not have died on a cross in our place. Talk about mercy (not getting what we do deserve.)

So, why am I so stressed out ? This momentous occasion is when I should really be celebrating the birth of Jesus? Why do I feel so much anxiety when I should feel relaxed and cheerful? Why do I want to stay home and not see family, or travel during this holiday? I don't really have an answer. 

This month has been terribly difficult for me. I am still out of work. I had a temporary job with Hobby Lobby, in October, but it ended as quickly as it started after a month. I cannot pay my bills. I feel like no employer will hire me, and maybe it is time to hit the reset button and start over...career-wise. I feel inhibited and restricted. 

Though times may be tough now, God has been building me up through His Word to strengthen me, to make me tougher than the world. I might lose everything, but I still have Jesus. I am trying to remember this. In John, I am reminded regularly, that without Jesus we can do nothing. If I want to accomplish anything spiritually significant, bear good fruit (Galatians 5:22-23), reach out to others in love, I cannot do it without the help of Jesus (John 15). He makes it all possible.

It is my prayer that the coming year will be blessed and prosperous, filled with hope, and revival in my heart, and an opportunity to move forward with a new career and a chance to return to college. It is also my prayer, that I will be a better friend to those I have been distant lately, to be more diligent in the Bible, to be consistent with fellowship, and to get involved in a group Bible study once again. I want to stand firm in the promises of the Word, and not compromise as I have done much so this last year. Additionally, my desire is to not make promises to others nor neglect my own needs. I want to do more artwork, write and make a difference in the lives of others in the year to come. 

In Jesus' name, amen.